31 Days of Pink: Going Public (Repost)
"For what shall it profit a man if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?"
|Halloween 2014, with Boston|
I never intended to have such a public battle with breast cancer, I still don't at times. It wasn't a choice, is was a calling.Well, let me rephrase that..I met him at the call and did have to make the choice to follow in obedience or go my own way. Anytime I speak, I usually open with "I am the survivor of many things, as have all of you, breast cancer is just one of them. However, it is the "one" that the Lord chose to use more publicly, more transparently and more for HIS GLORY than any other trial or victory thus far :) It was about Him anyway...no other way could I have stayed the course!!
Several thoughts on "Going Public" ...
- It's not for everyone. I get that. And it doesn't mean that every detail was or is disclosed. Nor does it mean that I only share on social media or blogs. I have shared just as much of my testimony with someone in a doctor's office or at Target as I have written. It has become part of my life. Sometimes not as often now with me being all "in tact." But it's even more unbelievable since I am and appear to be so healthy. (Thank you, Lord Jesus.)I guess my point is.. I am willing to share because it God's story, not mine. "Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect," 1 Peter 3:15
- It's an adjustment. Not as much for me, but for my family. That has become easier with time. It can be more painful for them to have to relive the story, than it is for me even though I was the one with cancer. It effects the whole family. And all of us deal and grieve in a different way. Once they realized that I felt supported without them feeling like they needed to go and "relive", it became easier for me to speak. Actually God does the speaking anyway. I am the one that gets distracted:) "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1
- It's a outlet. I discovered that I love to write right after Abby was born. I liked to document all the things she did to have as memories for later. I also began journaling every morning of verses and quotes from books and daily happenings. It helps me to write down any struggles or challenges and then go back and see how God answered my prayers. That was and is what blogging has done in a more public way. I probably communicate better in writing though(have you heard one of my stories by mouth???long version of the long story..haha).
- It's important because we get hope from those who have been there. I gained so much from my new peer group of survivors telling me of what helped them and what didn't. Sometimes I would be reading someone else's story and feel so at ease because finally, I could relate in this "whole new world". The comforting words and cards helped me through some tough days! "He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us." 2 Corinthians 1:4
- It's not about being private it's about presenting the gospel. Believe me, I took some time off, year four was that year for me. I had to. And now look what happened in year five...here I am, 31 days of writing! I am on a roll! During my time off, I dug deeper into the Word than ever before, laying it down, all of it, surrendering to His will,not mine. Talk about a major adjustment. I just thought I had been in the depth of His presence, seeing more and more of what He wanted my life to look like, instead of my version. As Romans 3:23 says " For all have sinned and come short of the Glory of God." And John 3:3 "Except a man be born again he cannot see the kingdom of God." "Therefore if any man be IN CHRIST, he is a new creature, old things are passed away, behold all things are become new." 2 Corinthians 2:15-16
I have gained many, many new friends on this journey and grown closer to old ones. I was not even texting yet when all this started and as I have said before I didn't even know I was a blogger until someone referred to Caringbridge as "my blog"! I have come a long way..haha! Some of my greatest resources and support have come from emails, texts and calls! Being open about what was going on has opened up opportunities to share the hope and faithfulness I have found in trusting the Lord. God has blessed me more than I could have imagined possible! I guess in a way, blogging is like going back to Vacation Bible School days and sing one of my favorites...
This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine, let is shine, let is shine, let is shine.
If we all will commit our lives to shine our light then we expose the darkness. Let your light shine!!
Day#309 Closing out the month, beginning anew